Introducing #CavsRank: Moments!

In the last few years, we’ve filled the hot summer days with some Cavalier nostalgia in the form of #CavsRank and #CavsRank: Villains. Now that our #CavsEndlessSummer has finally drawn to a close, we’ll pass the dog days by taking a look at the most pivotal moments of the LeBron 2.0 era. As with our villains countdown, we nominated as many we could think of and then voted and ranked in as pseudo-scientific a method as possible.

There have been so many funny, heartbreaking, chest-thumping, ref-screaming, sleep-stealing, awe-inspiring, infuriating, existence questioning, head scratching, long-sighing, fist pumping, life-affirming moments over the last couple years, we can’t list them all. And, we know we’ll miss more than our share. Even though we’re counting down 30 moments. I’m in love with our honorable mentions: some of moments we nominated that didn’t make the cut.

The Big “Chill Mode”

LeBron knows how to turn a phrase, and late in 2014 he coined “chill mode” to describe those moments when he wasn’t exactly at the peak of his physical and mental engagement in the game of roundball. After Tobias Harris spent two-and-a-half quarters outplaying a listless King on Boxing Day, 2014, some trash talk and some wild Harris elbows inspired LeBron to flip the switch, turn in a 15 point fourth quarter, and limit Harris to just two more points in a 98-89 victory. James commented after the game.

It wasn’t the shoulder or the elbow, it was the words that he said that got me going. I was actually in chill mode tonight, but chill mode was deactivated after that.

Despite James downplaying the incident, the term stuck, and became a metaphor for every time LeBron (and sometimes his teammates) seemed disengaged, coasted their way through the first 42 minutes against a mediocre opponent, or just never showed up. Lord knows we fretted over chill mode, and nothing seemed to bring it out in LBJ like David Blatt did. From LeBron’s disengagement in timeouts, to “the shove,” to subtweets, LeBron never seemed happy under Blatt, and before the 2015 playoff run, it showed in his play at times: missed box outs, blown defensive assignments, ball-hogging, etc.

Chill mode described the Cavs at their worst: selfish, lackadaisical, bored, and entitled. It provided a palpable counterpoint to when the Cavs were at their best. Of course “chill mode” James is still better than 95% of the players in the NBA. And, he proved in two straight playoffs that he might have more gears than a Maserati.

Timofey Mozgov Commercials

It’s such a shame that highs of Timo’s first season with the Cavs couldn’t be duplicated. And, if any one moment captured those highs and Cleveland’s sudden infatuation with the Russian big man, it was Timo’s commercials for the Brew Garden. The first one hit #CavsTwitter like canister of nitrous, and inspired one of the funniest posts in CtB history, John Krolik’s second by second explication of this video masterpiece. I’d block quote the whole piece if I could.

:06-10 — “Fabulous food, wine-spirits, and fantastic people.” I’d like to focus on our attention on the middle phrase, as it has become the most disputed line of dialogue in the entire filmography of Timofey Mozgov…. after listening to this specific line many, many times (as well as going to the Brew Garden’s menu and confirming that they serve wine), I am convinced that the line is “wine spirits.”

It could be argued that Timofey simply missed the comma in his line-reading, and that he was supposed to say “wine, spirits, and fantastic people.” This leads to a question: How many takes did they do? What was the cost-benefit of a bad line reading vs. having to clean up the effigy meal (which I remind you, contained cole slaw), make a new effigy meal, and start the commercial over from scratch again? This is the Children of Men one-take chase scene of local ads. (UPDATE FROM INTERVIEW: This commercial took five takes, and five subsequent broken plates, to make, according to my source at the Brew Garden.)

I’ll always wear my Mozgov Jersey backwards. While Timo’s subsequent commercials were great, like Timo’s second season, except for a few fleeting moments (see below), they never quite captured the zeitgeist of the original. Let’s hope that while Timo’s basketball skills are going Hollywood, his acting skills stay North Coast forever. Whatever happens, we’ll always have Winter Hat night. “…Good bear.”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZRkXrdQPKDw

The Tristan Thompson “Holdout”

(David Wood) “Can he shoot 3-pointers? Can he bring the ball up the court for a one man fast break? Can he make the second pass? Can he defend point guards?” All those questions and more came up when Tristan Thompson turned down a contract worth $80 million over five years at the beginning of last summer after the Finals (he averaged 9.6 points and 10.8 rebounds the 15 games he started in the playoffs). He wanted a max contract worth more than the five year $82 million contract Draymond Green had just signed. As the summer progressed, TT’s agent, who is also LeBron’s agent, even mentioned Tristan might take the qualifying offer to become an unrestricted free agent the following season if the Cavs didn’t up their number.

There were also rumors that James wouldn’t sign until TT was dealt with. By October first, James had signed, and Canadian TnT had declined the qualifying offer worth $6.8 million. He couldn’t walk, and unless an offer from an outside team came in, he essentially had to take whatever Cleveland offered. He was officially a holdout missing training camp and preseason games. The Cavs had all the had leverage in the world and could have low balled TT, who now desired a three year contract worth $17 million a year if a max contract wasn’t on the table. They were polite though and gave him the same deal Draymond received. That contract showed that they really valued his offensive rebounding, ability to switch onto smaller guys, and his heart. A title and a summer of insane contracts later, and it looks like David Griffin made a good decision.

The Richard Jefferson Signing

Don’t ask me how this didn’t make the top 30. Maybe because, as a “moment,” inking 35-year-old Jefferson to a veteran minimum contract seemed like rainbow sprinkles on a sundae: nice, but not essential. I was intrigued at the time, though.

Jefferson’s numbers are better than fellow old guys, Tayshaun, Caron, and Rasual Butler, and while Jefferson may be 35, he wasn’t terrible on the defensive end [in 2015]…

While this move isn’t sexy in the least, Jefferson is a consistently durable player who can still contribute at 35. He can fill in for LeBron for 15 minutes a night, and he’s better than Shawn Marion in that he can still hit threes, can still finish, and still defend. He’s the lowest risk player of all the older wings out there, save Paul Pierce. As with all older players, the question remains, “when will the wheels come off?”

Well, the wheels never came off for R.J., despite pedestrian regular season +/- numbers (401st in NBA). But, Jefferson’s ability to stretch the floor, drive and finish on closeouts was apparent throughout the season. He shot 38% from three and 75% inside of three feet. But, the playoffs were when RJ’s true worth was on display. RJ shot a blistering 61 TS% in the playoffs and was a key contributor throughout, but especially in a spot start in Game 3 of the Finals. His defense in Game 6, when he played 32 minutes, was among the best ever by a 35-year-old. You couldn’t have asked for a better season.

Dirty Delly

The Wombat tore through the 2015 NBA playoffs like it was a tussocky field. He left a trail of ejections, ankles, and empty IV bags. Starting with semifinals, Delly got Taj Gibson kicked out of a game when Matt scissored Gibson’s legs and goaded Taj into an ejection worthy kick.

Against Atlanta, Delly dove for a loose ball and Kyle Korver didn’t, which caused Korver to blow out his ankle, and a slew of twits to call it a “dirty” play.

Next game, Al Horford decided to go for some retaliation, dragged Delly to the ground and dropped the people’s elbow on him.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uBySQufMAZg

Delly’s relentless hustle and irritation took three players out of playoff games in 2015, and earned him the vote of The Dirtiest Player in the NBA in January of 2016 by coaches and players. Comically, Draymond Green, the man who spent all of the 2015 finals grabbing jerseys and sitting on Delly’s head, and all of the 2016 playoffs knocking people in the junk didn’t make the list.

For a while in 2016, Delly had to back off on his aggressive defense because he was definitely on the refs’ radar as he received not one, not two, but three flagrant fouls this last season. The controversy over whether Delly is dirty or just plays with maximum effort continues to this day. There’s rarely been a more devisive player even among Cavs fans. (I nearly threw down over Delly at a February 2015 game at the Q). While the Cavs have moved on from the Wombat, he’ll always be a huge part of the the 2015 finals, and a Cavalier champion.

The Dubs Ruin Christmas, and the MLK Day Massacre

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GuPzSTCBTUs

(David Wood) On Christmas Day, the Cavs battled the Warriors admirably. They were down by as many as 10 in the fourth quarter, and got within four with two minutes to go behind two James dunks and a block. The Cavs ultimately lost, but it was by just 89-83. They shot 5-30 from deep, and Shaun Livingston went 8-9 for 16 points. Those two things couldn’t happen again, right? And, the Cavs held Golden State to under 100 points for the first time all season. The loss felt “good,” to some fans, but it led to a disgruntled Cavs team, and Brian Windhorst even suggested that the Cavs “basically boycotted” the next game a night later, a 29-point loss to the Blazers.

Less than a month later, the Warriors played in Cleveland. They slaughtered the Cavs, 132-98. After one quarter, Golden State was up by 13. At halftime, the margin was 26 points. They eventually won the game by 34. Stephen Curry managed to score 35 points going 12-18 from the field. LeBron, Kyrie Irving and Kevin Love combined for 27 points, and hit just 11 of their 32 shots.

To make matters even worse, the Cavs were unable to stop Draymond Green when he was rolling to the hoop. He dished out 10 assists to go with 16 points. Whatever defense the Cavs had used to defend the Warriors in the 2015 finals and on Christmas Day was gone. After this game, it seemed like the Warriors were never going down. A 78 win season didn’t feel out of reach. David Blatt was fired a week later, and many a meme was penned about LeBron James’ anger on the bench.

Lil’ Kev

Tommy Bahama model, team joke, mascot, and comic relief: Lil’ Kev would’ve been an anachronism in any other time. Try to explain how a Tommy Bahama ad inside an airplane magazine became a rallying point for the Cavs, Clevelanders, and well, any NBA fan with a sense of humor. Well, you can’t. As ESPN’s Dave McMenamin reported only Richard Jefferson can.

Lil’ Kev, man, he’s a wild one. He’s a wild one. Everybody’s got like, alter egos. You’ve got Kobe; he’s the Black Mamba. You got Jordan; obviously Air Jordan. You got LeBron; and you got King James. So, you know, you got Kev and you got Lil’ Kev.

We were messing with Kev and we ripped it out [from the magazine]… From there, I just kept the paper and just started doing weird s— with it.

On the flight, the ad got passed around and several players held it up in front of their face while breaking out their best Love impression.

It became a phenomenon from there: R.J.’s snapchat alter ego, and a very necessary team-building, comedic, and reporter deflecting device for the Cavs. And no, I wasn’t able to explain to my parents how the whole thing worked.

Also Receiving Consideration:

J.R. Smith shows up on a scooter for Game 6 of the 2015 Finals; Cleveland sets the NBA Playoff three record (21); Kyrie’s Finals coming out party; Cavs Party in Vegas; Dahntay Jones’ second quarter in Game 7; Mo’s Return; The Kyrie Irving Extension; Cavs Win the Wiggins Lottery; J.R Smith vs T-Shirts; Iman Delivers his son; Channing Frye’s Group Texts; the Shump-Smith redemption.